You guys like my fun preamble before I get to the good dump stuff, right? I like to think I’m being clever and witty, but I’m probably just being whiny and annoying. This week, instead of one dedicated topic, let me give you a hodgepodge of random thoughts.
It seems like every spring training season, there are a few baseball players who get arrested while driving drunk. It’s laughable that a player can get suspended 50 games for their first offense for taking performance enhancing drugs, yet can get a DUI and be back at practice a day later. Performance enhancing drugs really don’t hurt anyone, yet Matt Bush RAN OVER A GUY’S HEAD. It’s a joke, and MLB should issue similar suspensions to guys who break, you know, actual laws.
I read the first Hunger Games book. Feel free to question my masculinity in the comments. It filled me with all sorts of emotions, emotions I didn’t care for. I’m not sure if I’ll read the other two. The story was fantastic, but I found the writing style a little amateurish. I kept thinking how much better the book would have been if it was written by an author who could write.
I often wonder if the personal finance bloggers who so readily admit their financial lives are a mess would take training tips from a fat personal trainer, health advice from a doctor who smoked a pack a day, or a dentist with a British smile. Apparently perception means nothing. Sure, you can garner little tidbits of info from people below your level, but you’re much better off looking upwards, not sideways.
Speaking of blogging, can I offer just one tip for the peanut gallery? I just want to offer one, the last thing I want is to give out a whole bunch of blogging advice. Can we, as a group, put a kibosh of emoticons? They make us look like a bunch of hacks who can’t use words to tell people we’re being sly. People have managed to read between the lines for centuries, they can certainly do it. I know, you don’t want to offend anyone. By putting in emoticons, you’re insulting their intelligence. You readers are smart enough to get it, it’s time to give them the credit they deserve.
Song I Like And Therefore You Should Too
Remember when Weezer was good, back in the 90s? You do, unless you’re only like 16. If you’re only 16… GO HANG OUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND STOP READING THIS CRAP.
Pink Triangle is about a guy who’s in love with a lesbian. Man, I hate it when that happens. And it happens to me A LOT. Do you guys think girls are just telling me they’re lesbians to get rid of me?
Sales Guy (to Comic Book Guy): A fat, sarcastic Star Trek fan! You must be a devil with the ladies!
Gambling Is Fun
I’d like to give myself a pat on the back for going 2-1 last week, considering I know nothing about NCAA basketball. It’s almost like I pull these picks out of my ass or something.
I’m going to stick with the NHL this week, since spring training is such a crapshoot. I’m going to go with Washington to beat Minnesota, since the only thing the Wild are wild about is sucking. I’m also going to take the Devils to beat a Penguins team that played last night in Ottawa. Rounding things up, I’m taking the Chicago Blackhawks to beat Nashville.
Overall Record: 29-35-2
A Post You Might Have Missed
Even though spring is officially here, it’s still cold outside. Why not snuggle on the couch with a nice cup of hot chocolate, and read every single word I’ve ever written? Your friends will totally be impressed, I promise.
I did a 10 part series on mortgages last year. Here’s part 9, all about ways to save money on your mortgage. Tip #1 for saving cash on your mortgage is to stop wiping with $10 bills and flushing them down the toilet. You’re welcome.
The More You Know
Wikipedia singlehandedly killed Encyclopedia Britannica, like they were both in the Hunger Games. THAT’S GOOD KILLIN!
The cluster flies are the genus Pollenia in the blowfly family Calliphoridae. Unlike more familiar blowflies such as the bluebottle genus Phormia, they do not present a health hazard because they do not lay eggs in human food. They are strictly parasitic on earthworms; the females lay their eggs near earthworm burrows, and the larvae then infest the worms. However, the flies are a nuisance because when the adults emerge in the late summer or autumn they enter houses to hibernate, often in large numbers; they are difficult to eradicate because they favour inaccessible spaces such as roof and wall cavities. They are often seen on windows of little-used rooms. They are also sometimes known as attic flies.
Flies are creepy. My parents’ cat has been known to kill and eat them. I did little to stop it from doing so.
Dirty Word In Words With Friends
I played ‘boob’ against pregnant real life friend Shirlee. For some reason, she is against naming her unborn daughter Nelsina.
If you want to play me, I’m ‘nelsmi’. My sexiness will shine through, even through the iPhone.
Babe Loosely Related To Finance
I’m listening to Roxanne by The Police as I type this. Therefore, this week’s babe will be the hottest chick I can find with that name.
She’s from England. She’s almost worth a trip across the pond, isn’t she?
Time For Links
I’m going to make up for last week’s abbreviated version by going a little longer this week, and by including some blogs I don’t normally link to. New blogs are fun. You should go check them out.
First though, back to Control Your Cash. I just can’t help linking to them every week. The content is just outstanding. This week, Greg points out that the CEO of McDonalds doesn’t even have a college degree. Maybe you might want to rethink that sociology degree and go, you know, get a job.
Rachelle from Landlord Rescue has some strong words for Jim Flaherty and Canadian bank CEOs. It’s funny how the banks want the government to protect them from themselves.
Hot personal finance chick Jen from She Bloggs (still don’t know what the extra g is for, Jen) points out that often the most lucrative place to be is where no one else wants to be.
lover chick I awkwardly hit on, Young and Thrifty, deactivated the Facebook. While I commend her for it, how am I supposed to stalk her now? I guess I’ll have to go climb that tree near her house again. Has anyone seen my binoculars?
Speaking of creepy, Bridget from Money After Graduation hits on one of her readers. Oh, plus she uses that to make some sort of serious point about finance or something.
Melissa from Broke TO blatantly steals someone else’s idea of how to make a super cheap iPhone speaker. It’s a pretty cool idea, so I’ll allow it.
Alyosa from My Broken Coin is originally from Eastern Europe. Her mother was a mail order bride. The story is pretty cool.
Barel Karsan wrote about a company who is borrowing money from their CEO – at a 12% interest rate.
Canadian Mortgage Trends is the place to go for info on the Canadian mortgage industry. They speculate about upcoming changes in the mortgage market.
My staff writing is almost over. So go check out my latest at Canadian Finance while you still can, about whether you’re wasting time on stuff that doesn’t matter.
Yes! I was actually in two.
Thanks to Marissa from Thirty Six Months for the editor’s pick. I will totally make it up to her with some sexy time.
And thanks to Control Your Cash for… nothing.
Phew. That was long. Have a good week everyone.