We’re gonna talk about credit cards today. Specifically, the MBNA SmartCash Mastercard. But more on that in a minute.

If you’re anything like me, you’re spending far too much time on the interwebz making bad jokes and not enough time on things like showering and putting on pants. God, you sicken me.

And if you’re like me, you’ve still got the same credit card since you first signed up for one as an 18 year old. Oh, what a great time that was. You couldn’t talk to girls without getting all nervous and trying too hard. You spent too many evenings consuming alcoholic beverages just because you now could. And once you and some buddies even stole a shopping cart and threw it into the river. Your life was truly pathetic.

We can’t go back and talk to all those pretty girls who would have ultimately rejected us anyway, but we can correct that wrong with a brand spankin’ new credit card, one that blows your current craptastic 1% cash back card out of the water.

Enter the MBNA SmartCash Mastercard.

So pretty…

 

The Benefits

The deal on the MBNA SmartCash Mastercard is pretty good. You’ll get:

  • 5% cash back on groceries and gas purchases for 6 months, then 2% cash back after that.
  • 1% cash back on everything else.
  • 1.99% interest rate on balance transfers for 12 months.
  • No annual fee
  • Oh, and $100 worth of gift cards. $25 worth upon approval, and then $75 worth of gift cards once you spend $150 on the card.

Let’s assume you get the card and use it to to buy $300 worth of groceries per month and $100 in gas, just keeping it for six months. You’ll earn:

  • $45 worth of rewards in month one, $20 from using the card and $25 in a gift card.
  • Then up to $65 in total rewards in month two.
  • Up to $85 in total rewards in month three.
  • After month four you’ll be up to $105 in rewards
  • After month five the rewards will be worth $125
  • And finally, after getting the rewards for month six and collecting the $75 gift card, total rewards for using the card will be $220.

That’s pretty darn good, just for buying the stuff you’d normally buy anyway. And if 2% cash back on groceries and gas don’t do it for you after six months, just punt the card and keep all of the rewards. Repeat with the next deal that comes out, and you can make four figures a year just churning credit cards. All the cool kids are doing it.

Don’t just sit there. Start clickin’.

 

For the interest of full disclosure, yes, I get paid if you get approved for a credit card. No, I didn’t sell out. It’s actually legitimately a good deal. Even though I’d have no problem recommending that you pour barbecue sauce all over yourself and jumping into a pool filled with pirañas (because if you’re stupid enough to do it, not my problem),  I actually think the MBNA SmartCash Mastercard is a good deal.

Anyhoo, the deal’s only good until the end of April. Which means you’ve got a little time to slack off, but not much. Also, there’s no reason why you should give me either of your gift cards, but it’d be awesome if you did. I like Subway.

Tell everyone, yo!